In the book you suggest that pre-marital relationships should only become romantic at engagement.
Nowadays a man woos a woman to be his girlfriend.
The implications in this passage are clear: sexual activity is to be reserved for the marriage relationship.You argue that how we live as Christians in our sexual relationships broadcasts a message to the world about the gospel, either rightly or wrongly.We work primarily from 1 Corinthians 7:9, where Paul instructs non-married individuals to pursue sexual fulfillment exclusively in marriage.The ravages of sin have left each of us with a disordered sexuality.And those guidelines are all over the map.So while our book calls Christian singles to a high calling, we hope it also encourages and deepens their confidence in the grace, power, and mercy of God.The great beauty of sex and marriage is that they point beyond themselves to the gospel.It is never wrong to anticipate a good gift from God.You write, To romantically woo a woman, or to give your heart away to a man, prior to a marriage commitment is to paint an unclear portrait of Christ and the church.And it is the real thing that truly brings peace.A primary concern of the book is to help pre-engaged couples keep their wits about them.Likewise, the sexual ethic of the neighbor relationship is detailed in 1 Corinthians 7:9 and 1 Timothy 5:2namely, that sexual activity is prohibited.This doesnt hold up theologically free local adult dating site or scripturally, and it certainly doesnt work pragmatically.In addition to exacerbating sexual impropriety, you also argue that dating relationships tend to create unhealthy emotional expectations.But many add another category: (4) the dating relationship.Importantly, she shows us that the standards for young men and women are not as different as they used to be, as women talk about 'friends with benefits' and 'one and done' hook ups.This really is the theological core of the book, and where we begin in chapter.What would you say to Christian singles?So in chart form, it looks like the below.Yet we treat these relationships as though they were a quasi-marriage, and thus grant them a measure of security that isnt really there.We are not suggesting that an engaged couple repress their sexual and romantic feelings for each other, or pretend that they are not sexually attracted to each other.
A main problem with contemporary dating relationships is that they tend to grant license to sexual activity that we would otherwise intuitively deem inappropriate.
It is this glorious exchangetypified by human marriagethat speaks of our hope.
And thats not a recipe for chastity.